Wednesday, 20 June 2012

The Gallery - Family


When I think of the word 'Family' I obviously instantly think of my little family unit. Me, Papa, our four kids and our Granddaughter. I have watched our little unit grow for the past 23 years and feel such an immense satisfaction as I watch our next generation progress. 

It has not been an easy road to be able to sit with my husband in total harmony, after 25 years together. We really have been through some tough times together, but we fought hard to keep our marriage together and are now reaping the benefits that sharing our role as Grandparents bring.


As a Grandparent myself, I now know what my life is all about. It is about my next generation, and the generation after that, and so on. Its about my legacy and what I want to pass down to future generations. I love our Granddaughter as if she was my own child and until I became a Grandmother myself I didn't realise that my own Grandparents may have loved me and my brothers that much too. 


All my Grandparents have now past away and we lost our last one, my Nan last September. I loved all four of them and was devastated to lose them all equally, but I found losing my Nan last year particularly hard to bear because since losing my own Mum six years ago my Nan had become a kind of substitute. We really bonded these past six years because she knew how it felt to lose a Mum as well as a Daughter. I felt my Nans pain and she felt mine because we were both missing a person we loved so much. 

(My Parents & Grandparents - Nan, who I lost last year is 2nd from right)

Nan knew I was struggling to cope with the loss of my Mum and I shared feelings with her that I didn't with anyone else, not even my own Husband. Now Nan has gone the extended family has fallen apart, arguments have followed her death. arguments that would not have arisen had my Mum still been alive today because my Mum was the strong one, the wise one, the generous one, the loyal one, the peacemaker. My Mum was the anchor to our family and now that she is gone, my extended family are no more.

I look at that photo of my Grandparents on my Mum & Dads wedding day and know that they must have been so full of hope for my Mum and their future generations. My Grandparents lived for their family and my Grandad would be so disappointed in certain family members right now.

I am determined to raise my family with the same values that my own Mother raised me with, and that is to be loyal to our siblings, our blood, no matter what. Even during times of disagreements to always remember that they are a family unit and should stick together. Sadly, lots of people in my Mums family did not share these same values.

I have realised that money means more to some, than family relationships. To me this is very sad for them, I pity them, as money is soon spent but love from loyal people is everlasting. I hope mine will be better than that and will always look out for one another. That to me is what the word 'Family' means....Loyalty.

What does Family mean to you?


10 comments:

  1. Family is everything- I don't know where I'd be without my family, my mum, dad, grandparents.. I've found a new side to my own parents since having Isaac in October- it's mellowed them considerably, and I've found them starting to do all the lovely things they never did with me and my brother, and always scolded my nan and grandad for doing!
    I was lucky enough to know my great nanny, and always said I wanted my children to know theirs too- the relationship between my own grandparents and my son is something magical that I can't quite describe. Everybody seems to have got younger because of him, and we've become an even tighter unit :)
    A lovely post Mama S (and I still can't believe you're a nana!!) xx

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  2. Family is incredibly important to me though I don't see my mum as often as I'd like. My dad died in July 2001 and I miss him everyday. I have an older brother and younger sister. But I would definitely say my little family unit of husband and daughter are the most important in my life.

    Beautiful wedding photo.
    CJ x

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  3. That reminded me a lot about my mum's family. They were all quite close until my grandparents died and it is so sad that they all stopped speaking to each other and that was over money, work load and general stuff that to me lacked importance. It is sad and like you I am trying to bring my family up to love and respect each other no matter what!

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  4. It's great to have memories like this old photo, I must dig out my mum's drawers for some when I go back to Romania!

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  5. What moving and honest words. Love the pics too. You have a beautiful family. xx

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  6. Oh my I am almost crying after reading that post Mama. I think the bit that struck me most about your piece was how you describe how much you love your grandchild and now you know how your grandparents must have loved you (and your siblings). It makes me sad that i Don't see enough of my grandparents anymore.
    Thanks for sharing your memories and photos xx

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  7. Really interesting post, inspiring relationships but such sadness.
    I think you will do your mum proud - very proud!

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  8. My mother-in-law regularly says she thought she would love being a grandmother, but she had no idea about how much she would love her grandchildren. It has really surprised her. I'm sure the love you feel and show to your granddaughter and children will leave quite a legacy.

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  9. Your words are really moving in this post. I was always closer to my Gran than my Mum but since my Gran passed away, I've become closer to my mum. Those are lovely family values.

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  10. A really moving post, I only ever had 2 nans, no grandfathers (long story!), I lost my last one 6 years ago :( My family is a nightmare & no one speaks to each other.... it's really sad, I try to be the peacemaker but some people you can't help xx

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