I have always been a bit obsessed with my weight although saying that it didn't actually start until I was about eighteen. I can't actually even remember weighing myself until then. Mum always stocked a healthy larder full of fruit, cereal bars and barley cup.
Mum rarely ever bought chocolate, crisps or squash and we definitely never had fizzy drinks in the house. We were a Mormon family so tea, coffee and cola was banned instead we would drink water, shloer or barley cup as an alternative to coffee. My school lunch box consisted of a wholemeal sandwich filled with primula cheese spread, an orange or apple, a Harvest crunch bar and a bottle of water.
I remember feeling so envious of the kids who had crisps and penguin bars which would be nearly every other kid in school. It is only when my own kids started school and I began to prepare their school packed lunches that I realised that Mum was pretty cool ensuring we ate healthily during the day and resisting our pleas for crisps & sugar.
Throughout my twenties and thirties I only ever gained weight during my pregnancies. Each one gaining at least four stone and jumping from eight stone to 12, which for my small 5ft 2in frame is too heavy for me. I would lose the first three stone within three months using slimfast then for the last stone which is always the toughest to budge I joined either weight watchers or Slimming world.
This time things are different. I have gained five stone in five years and the weight was still creeping up until I joined Weight watchers three weeks ago.
It all began to creep on when I lost Mum, Papa and I separated for twelve months and I gave up smoking all in the same year. I ate for comfort and then the over eating became a habit...An addiction.
I just want to be my old self again...of course, minus the cigarette.
Last year I did go to the doctors for a blood pressure check as I do tend to suffer with a bit of high blood pressure. It was raised and so was my cholesterol levels. I was told to lose weight or I would need medication. The Doctor also said I was still grieving for my Mum and that a lot of people comfort eat during times of loss and if I would like some help from him to lose weight then come back in six months.
To be honest I was horrified..."Need help from the doctor to lose weight!" I don't think so, surely I can do this on my own? Can't I?
Well actually no I can't do it on my own but I don't want help from the lovely Doctor...I would rather have the support of friends. Friends who are battling with the same issues as me. So I have started a group on Facebook called Slinky Slimmers and the Gorgeous Gini over at Desperately Seeking Myself helps me run it (Well to be fair Gini has done most of the organising over there). I have also joined Weight Watchers (And lost nearly a stone in three weeks...Woo Hoo), and then I spotted #Mumentum on a few blogs started by the lovely Liska over at New Mum Online. A group of Mum Bloggers supporting each other on their weight loss journey...Perfect, so I tweeted her yesterday and asked if I could join in too.
So that's where I'm at. I am bridesmaid for my Cousin in September so really need an extra stone and a half off by then. As an incentive for myself I will be making myself a vintage wardrobe of clothes in a few sizes smaller all ready to wear for when I've lost my first two stone.